Thinking Out Loud
by DanaMulder
Summary: Short, cute fic'... HMS, of course...


Harm had officially had enough of the decaying rodent smell that had recently inhabited his office. Dropping down onto all fours he examined the ventilation shaft on his wall. Harm unscrewed the cover plate and laid it beside him before hesitantly reaching his arm into the shaft. Thinking better of the idea after a moment he got up to procure a flashlight from a drawer in his desk. Shining the light into the crevices of the heating duct he saw the culprit, a lovely furry putrefying lump jammed into a turn in the shaft. Harm rose from the floor once again and headed to Mac's office.  
  
"You wouldn't happen to have a pair of latex gloves would you?" Mac looked up, surprised.  
"What on Earth do you need gloves for?"  
"I found what's rotting in my office. There's a rat stuffed in the ventilation shaft. I wasn't too intent on getting it out with my bare hands." Mac looked at him and smiled.  
"You big baby."  
"What? Are you intent on touching it?" He looked at her quizzically for a moment. "Then again you big Marines can do anything, right?" Harm's eyebrows rose, sending Mac's warning signal off in her head. If she didn't hurry up and find him gloves she was going to end up removing the dead animal herself.  
"Let's just go see if we can find some in the break roo-"  
"Oh no, no, no. I want you to get it, since I'm too childish." She glared at him as he grinned at her. She wasn't one to back down to a challenge. Even if that "challenge" was as simple as Operation Rodent Retrieval.  
"Fine." The two strode into the break room and managed to find a box of old latex gloves stashed away in a drawer. Harm carried them smugly under his arm as he followed Mac back to his office. Shutting the door behind them he tossed her the box of gloves.  
"Your latex, ma'am. I know how much you love snapping it on." Her eyes grew wider.  
"Harm!" she exclaimed throwing the box back at him and rolling her eyes. "Now where is this thing?"  
"Back in the far right corner. You'll have to get down on all fours."  
"Is that an order, Commander?" She said, tilting her head. Harm shrugged.  
"I'm just saying." He turned the flashlight on and pointed it at the rat. "Go for it, Colonel."  
"Ugh. This does smell terrible. Harm, hold the light still." In response to her criticism of his flashlight steadying abilities, Harm shook the flashlight intentionally. Being the graceful man he is, he ended up dropping it and watched as it rolled under his desk. He stooped down and stuck his head under his desk to retrieve it.  
"Now what are you doing, Flyboy?" Mac said looking over her back.  
"Getting my flash-" Harm's sentence was cut short as he hit his head on the desk.  
"Brilliant. Are you okay?" Mac watched as he staggered upright.  
"Owch. Yeah, I'm fine." He flicked the light back on and pointed it in the direction of the rodent. He couldn't help to notice Mac's skirt riding up as she bent over. Damn, if only they made the Marine green skirts shorter, he thought.  
"Damn, if only they made the Marine green skirts shorter." Mac whirled around, staring at Harm.  
"What?!" He looked horror stricken.  
"I didn't say anything."  
"You just said you wished my skirt was shorter!" She looked oddly at him. Harm's mind raced. He knew Mac had some strange psychic abilities from time to time, but mind reading? "I swear, I said nothing." Mac continued to squint at him. Hesitantly she turned back around and grabbed the rat. My Ninja Girl does have a nice butt, I have to hand it to her, Harm mused once again, watching his partner more than where the flashlight was pointed. The back of his head throbbed from where he had hit it.  
"My Ninja Girl does have a nice butt, I have to hand it to her." Mac, rat in hand, stood up abruptly.  
"Excuse me? What about my six?" She watched his face intently, seeing that it looked like he was either going to choke or throw up very soon.  
"But."  
"Yes, butt. That's exactly what you were saying." She desperately tried to keep from laughing. She attempted to put on her most serious face. "So the Commander thinks I have a good six. Well, I must say this comes as a shock to me, Harm." It shouldn't, his mind reeled.  
"It shouldn't." Mac's jaw dropped for a third time.  
"Harm, how hard did you hit your head." Head, Harm thought, I'd like to give you - Harms thoughts were interrupted by Mac before he could complete the sentence.  
"Head. I'd like to give you-"  
"Harm! Shh!" Mac burst into laughter at her Stickboy. Harm tried to quite his inner voice as he remembered the time he had fallen from a chair and hallucinated the rest of the day. Mac sure did look nice in a towel, he pondered. Could he now be voicing his innermost thoughts out loud? The idea scared him. How much had he already said?  
"Mac sure did look nice in a towel." He said blatantly. Mac's eyebrows scrunched.  
"Thank you, I guess," she mumbled to herself as she threw the rat away in his trash bin and disposed of the gloves, trying to remember any time he had seen her in a towel. "Harm, come on, we're taking a lunch break early, before you get yourself into trouble with someone else." Mac smiled at him pitifully.  
"I'd like to eat you for lunch." Mac stared at him again. "What?" he asked. "I swear, if I didn't know any better I'd think you said that one intentionally. You are one hell of a nut case, Rabb."  
  
---------- About 5 minutes earlier.. --------  
  
Hearing voices coming from one of the offices next to him, the Admiral politely ended a phone conversation. He generally didn't listen in on his subordinate's conversations but this one was particularly clear, and, well, rather unusual. AJ sat transfixed, staring oddly at the ventilation shaft to his right. There was nothing wrong with the apparatus, but the conversation he heard drifting into his office truly made him wonder. He had known the Commander to be rather daring, but to tell the Colonel she had a nice six straight to her face? Even a fully trained SEAL like himself would have trouble doing that. 


End file.
